If you were to ask me when my addiction started, I would tell you it began the day I was born.
Many people try to argue which is the gateway that leads a person down the road to a life in addiction. My gateway was childhood trauma. The key to the gate… my shame.
My addiction was an abduction disguised as freedom. Freedom from the shame that had consumed me ever since I can remember.
I am a daughter of madness. Growing up in a home that was suffocating in mental illness and sadness.
I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse.
I was taught silence.
I was shown darkness.
And I grew to hate myself for it all.
I don’t think anyone sets their sights on drowning in addiction when they grow up; homeless and hopeless, wandering the streets like an animal without a home.
But that’s exactly what happened to me.
That’s exactly what I became.
In 2011 I came face to face with the nothingness of my existence.
And a tiny spark ignited in my heart that finally believed I was worth more than dying that way.
Today I am silent about nothing.
I stand tall as a speaker and an advocate, a writer and a published author.
I became a mother and woman of honor.
My purpose is to show what a healing woman looks like; to leave a lighted path for anyone who may be searching for a way out of their own darkness.
We are not alone.
We are worthy.
We can heal.
I love you.